Awesome is not synonymous with married.

**This is definitely geared toward those people living in/knowing about the LDS culture**

**This is for people who are not married, but isn't meant to belittle married people IN ANY WAY**

There is a word that can instill an entire spectrum of emotions in people. For some, excitement and anticipation. For others, dread and apprehension. Some might be sick of the word, others may never tire of it. Some people post about theirs on social media all the time and we would like to punch them in the face  kindly tell them to relax with the mushy posts. If you haven't guessed it yet, I'll spell it out for you:

m-a-r-r-i-a-g-e

Yup, that word. As saints of the latter day, we hear about it a lot. It's kinda the main point of life. Okay, not really the main point...but since we believe it is central to our salvation, it's a big deal. This is something that's been on my mind a little for a while. But first, I just need to introduce the context a little bit. 

I am in a fantastic singles ward right now. The best way I can think to describe us would be this: we are a group of people who are weirdly passionate about a myriad of things, and we all get along fantastically. Seriously, we're great. Anyway, I was talking the other night to someone and I was saying how much I loved our ward and I said:

"I don't even know why our ward is a singles ward because everyone is seriously soooo amazing. We have such great people in this ward, how are we all single????"

And then I thought, that's silly. But the more I think about it, the more I realize I hear things along those lines all the time and don't even think twice about it. Hear what things? Well, things like:

"How is _______ not married? I mean, seriously, she's amazing!!"

or

"He is honestly the sweetest guy, how is he still single?"

You've probably said/heard these things too. So all I have to say is this:

AWESOME* ISN'T SYNONYMOUS WITH MARRIED.

*Insert any other complementary descriptive word here

Now, I don't consider myself extreme in really any of my views, so I'm not saying that phrases like these are tearing us apart from the inside out, and the only way to be saved is to eradicate these phrases and we're all going to die in a zombie apocalypse if we don't. But I think sometimes little thoughts like this sneak into my head and I think

What does that married girl have that I don't?

(Well she's got a husband, for one thing.)

Almost like there is an "awesomeness game" in which our wonderful married peers have some secret cheat code figured out that bumps them up a level. Or like there is a certain amount of awesomeness needed, and once you reach that level of achievement, you'll quickly find another who has reached their awesomeness requirement and then you get married. Or how about this one:

Don't look for the right one, be the right one.

Uh, great. Don't get me wrong, it is wonderful to always be looking for ways to improve ourselves, but if the search is because we think there is a magical quality which--once attained--will bring marriage with it, we'll be left feeling inadequate and incapable. It's dangerous to start tying marriage to ANY of our qualities, whether physical, mental, or spiritual. 

If I was prettier

If I was smarter

If I was more fit

If I was more kind

If I was more funny

If I was more spiritual

If I was more

If I was more

If I was more

If I was more

It's a dangerous cycle to say that if we were more of anything, then we'd be worth loving enough for somebody to marry us. But here is the good news:

  

We are worth loving right now, and we are loved right now.  

We are loved enough for our brother, our Savior Jesus Christ, to suffer in a garden for not just our sins, but our heartaches, our struggles, our pains, and our sufferings. 

Yeah, we have a brother who loves us enough to die for us. 

And you didn't have to earn that love, you are worth that love. 

So here's the thing, a person can read their scriptures every darn day, attend the temple weekly, go to all their church meetings, magnify their calling in their ward, serve others, continually work to improve themselves, and still not be married.

But they're so awesome, how are they not married?

You're darn right, they are. They are awesome. And God knows they're awesome. And they should know that they're awesome. And they should keep being awesome. Because being awesome, humble, sweet, caring, selfless, dedicated, faithful, honest, helpful, and positive are no more synonymous with marriage than ocean (yes, that was totally random) is synonymous with marriage. While many married people possess these qualities, they are neither a requirement nor a standard for being loved and/or married.

So by all means:

be awesome.

Because, while being awesome certainly is not a requirement for marriage, you'll have a whole lot more fun on your way there if you are.

Not-So-Little Black Dress

The end of the semester is upon us, and I could not be more excited. Seriously, things have just been heating up this week with school, with my biggest project being in my Patternmaking class.

Now, I'm just gonna say that I would rather work on a final project than a final paper ANY day. It's just the way I am. So from the very beginning of the semester, I looked at the syllabus and have been waiting for this assignment to come ever since.

It's called the Little Black Dress assignment. We design a dress from sketches to construction. A little play on words here because while it was a project to make a little black dress, the play on words is that it's actually little--as in designed and sewn in 1/2 scale.

I've shown people pictures of the dress and they ask me if I could wear it. I repeat: this dress is 1/2 scale...as in 36" tall. Even if it looks different on the mannequin, this is not a life size dress. But it was a life-size project. I present to you

KAYLA 1137

(Kayla because that's my name, 11 is my number in volleyball, and 37 is the number of hours I spent working on it.)

 I wanted to do something spectacular, and what's more spectacular than a full-length formal gown? If it looks tall, it is...I made the length and set the mannequin to be my height (in half scale, of course).

It started with this sketch

 Apparently I sketched the back a LOT lighter than the front:

The pattern pieces ended up looking like this. It's fully lined so almost every one of these pieces was cut out on both lining fabric, and the outside fabric.

 Usually I'm lazy and don't pin very much, but let me just say that when you've already logged twelve hours on making patterns, you're not gonna take any chances. As seen below, I may have gone a tad overboard with the pinning.

All necessary nothing and clipping was done

Pins for days:

One of the four fully lined, fabulous ruffles.

Want more pictures of the final dress? Cool, because I want to show you some:

FRONT:

BACK:

RIGHT SIDE:

LEFT SIDE:

This project was seriously so fun. I logged in a lot of late night hours to crank this bad boy out and I am so proud of it. It's so fun to have a vision in your brain, but then to see it in real life from your own creation is one of the best feelings there is in the whole wide world. 

Again, just because it's rad: