Happiness

I'm a firm believer that positive thinking can change a persons whole perspective on life (even if I don't always apply it myself.) In fact, I have a quote hanging on my wall at this very second that reads: "I am in charge of how I feel and today I am choosing happiness."

But I've seen a few different things around lately that struck me and after a little while of thinking about them, I just can't let it go without having my say...even if no one else cares...So here's the deal, I've been seeing a bunch of quotes about happiness lately and there are some that really are good and have real positive meaning. Maybe I'm being a nitpick here, but there are also some that I think give a false idea of what happiness is.

"Exist to be happy."

"Nothing is worth it if you aren't happy."

"Happiness is saying no to things that stress you out."

"If you're not happy, you're doing something wrong."

To illustrate my point, I'm going to talk about volleyball a little bit. I play volleyball for Utah State University. I've got two years left and up to this point in my life it is the hardest, most mentally and physically challenging thing I've ever done. Despite it being incredibly difficult, I have continued for several reasons that I don't need to expand on. As an overall experience, it truly has been invaluable but I have to admit, in the day-to-day grind of things, the positives can be hard to see. 

A few months ago when we were nearing the end of our season, I had a bad day at practice and left with a million things running through my head most of which had to do with quitting. I was angry because I had felt that I was really supposed to be at USU playing volleyball and suddenly (not for the first time) I was questioning that feeling. I was convinced that everything I'd worked for and all the good that could come from continuing couldn't possibly be worth it because I wasn't happy doing it anymore. 

Of course, I didn't quit and all my misery and sadness were gone the next day. Now, it could very well be that I'm just a drama queen who needs to learn to tone down my emotions, but I don't think so.  I think that everyone has times when they are frustrated or stressed out or upset and so often we are led to believe by well-meaning words that this means we are doing something wrong. This quote by Gordon B. Hinckley sums it up nicely:

This quote is one of my favorites because while I am generally happy with my life and where it's going, there are definitely times when I do not feel this way. In those times, I start thinking something is wrong with my life or I'm not where I'm supposed to be or I'm not doing what I'm supposed to be doing. I promise that when these thoughts do come, it's usually against my will. Although there have been times when it seems I'm content pouting about life, as a general rule I don't purposely set out to make myself unhappy. It's a frustrating cycle to have feelings of unhappiness and then to tell yourself that you shouldn't feel unhappy.

I have now formed the personal opinion that always being happy is impossible. I might even go so far as to argue that if you are always blissfully happy, you are most likely blissfully unaware. In 2 Nephi 2:25 we read that "Adam fell that men might be; and men are that they might have joy."

That alone sounds almost like the quotes I posted above, making you feel that if you aren't feeling joy or happiness that something is wrong with you. After all it says that the point of our being is to feel joy. However, just two verses before this famous scripture, we read that had Adam and Eve not partaken of the fruit, they "would have had no children; wherefore they would have remained in a state of innocence, having no joy, for they knew no misery; doing no good, for they knew no sin."

In Ecclesiastes 3 we also read, 1: "To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:" 4: "A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance."

Now, to me it seems that we are not being told to be happy all the time. What I love about Gordon B. Hinckley's quote is the last line: "The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride." It says nothing of being happy for the whole ride, in fact, it disputes it. It tell us to be grateful for the ride.

I would just hate for anyone to believe that when they are unhappy, they are inadequate or worse, alone, in their feelings. The way to counter periods of unhappiness is to focus on serving others and working to be grateful for what you have. Focusing on the positive may not immediately result in happiness, but focusing on gloomy thoughts will always make you feel worse. It's not easy, but the struggles we go through make the successes that much sweeter.

We can choose to make situations better by having a positive mindset. We can choose to be grateful even in the midst of our struggles. We can choose to spread positivity and kindness. These things combined will lead to an overall happy life, even though we will still need to weather storms and periods of life when we do not necessarily feel filled with joy. And because you can't have too many quotes:

"Awesome things will happen today if you choose not to be a miserable cow."

Shifty Dress

When I first saw the dress that inspired this one, I could not think of what it was called. I typed "boxy dress" into the search bar of Pinterest and finally came across the real silhouette name which is a shift dress, so I'm gonna call this one "shifty."

One of my New Years resolutions was to not buy any new clothes from the store this year. I figure that I've got some sewin' skills so why not use them?? In the past when I've sewn things for myself, I tend to get impatient so I don't spend all the necessary time beforehand in the prep-work making sure things are gonna fit. This time, I decided I really wanted a dress that would fit well (imagine that) so I did a partial test run:

This absurdly bright purple fabric is actually a sheet purchased for $3.00 from DI. Part of the reason why I never take the time to make a muslin (test garment) is because I don't want to "waste" fabric. People always ask if sewing my own clothes is cheaper than buying. It totally depends on what it is, but often it's not. So the added cost of making a whole test garment out of fabric that is just going to be thrown away is not appealing to me, hence the wrinkled, skiwampus, sort-of test that you see below:

Yes, she's wearing a tank-top underneath the muslin...modest is hottest.

I tried the largest size on the pattern which turned out to be huge! The mannequin is set to basically my exact measurements and this was massive. So, before jumping down three sizes and sewing it up, I decided I needed to measure. I went over it about six times to make sure my math was right, measuring from my middle back to side seam, and the length from my neck to my waist and all that good stuff. It takes quite a lot of maneuvering. As it turned out, going down just one size made the dress almost 3 inches smaller around the waist, so it's a really good thing I measured it out.

People often comment how nice it must be to sew because I'm so tall and I can make things for my height. It's true, but patterns come in standard sizes too, which means a lot of alterations before I even start sewing. For example, I had to add 8 1/2 inches to this dress to make it long enough. 

I was using the scraps from papers I cut out, so it looks a little shoddy, but I works, so I'm fine with it. Something to remember is that you can't just add length to the very bottom of something to make it longer. Curves along the pattern make it so it won't turn out right. Manufactured patterns always have a lengthen/shorten line where it won't affect the design to adjust length.

When I'm working on sewing projects, I'm always worried someone will come by and I'll be all embarrassed by the mess because let me tell you, I am not an organized creator. 

This isn't even the worst of it at all, but my living room was a disaster the whole time I was working on the dress because cleaning as I go is not something I do well.

In the case of this dress, it was MUCH cheaper to make than to buy something like this at a store. Why? Two words: DI. When I find good fabric at DI, I feel like I'm robbing someone because it is so so cheap. The white and black fabric I got for $4.00. It was 60" wide and about 2 1/2 yards long. It's got a really cool texture to it and I still have a yard left over. 

The pale yellow fabric was almost 4 yards for $2.00. I used it for the lining and sleeves. It's a really lightweight linen that's much softer than the other fabric, so it was nice to put this inside for comfort.

One of the biggest fabric wasters in the whole world is not knowing how to lay your patterns out on it. I've seen so many people just lay their fabric out folded in half like it comes on the bolt which wastes so much. My mom taught me a long time ago to fold it as small as you can to fit the largest piece. It can take a little longer because you typically need to do one or two pieces at a time, but it saves a ton of fabric.

 Here's the finished product. Now the only question is who wore it best?:

(The cows thought I did.)

My (Sister's) Big Fat LDS Wedding

Okay, so the parallels between My Big Fat Greek Wedding and this experience pretty much end with a big, loud, family that likes to eat food but the title sounded catchy.

One day in October as I left volleyball practice I saw that I had missed a call from my sister. I called her back and she was with her then-boyfriend and they said, "Guess what? We're engaged!" I screamed and got super excited and started cheering in the car. Let me explain: I was happy for them, I promise! But when she said we're engaged, the words I heard were you get to plan my wedding. Which, if I'm going to be honest was probably about on par with my excitement about the actual marriage.

As they were deciding a venue, they went back and forth between absurdly expensive reception centers or doing in--please hide disgusted faces--a church cultural hall. I have to admit, I urged for the church. I know, church gyms are not exactly known for creating a romantic reception atmosphere, but just trust me on this one. 

Anyone who knows me and has watched me in my "project mode" knows that I'm not exactly forthcoming with details. I see things a certain way in my head but I don't want to tell anyone else what's going on in there in case whatever I do doesn't resemble it. Half the time I end up changing it as I go anyway and it ends up different than even I envisioned. It drives my mom nuts when she asks "well, what are you going to do?" and I just say "you'll just have to see it when it's done." 

Anyway, one thing that absolutely could not be that way was my idea to drape the ceiling of the cultural hall. That was one project I was not going to be able to figure out on my own. So I told my dad and he knew what I had in mind so our first significant purchase was buying 400 feet of tobacco cloth which is made to cover plants and comes in 12 foot wide rolls. 

Other things came along nicely and there were more than a few times that I texted my dad to go pick up random things around Salt Lake from people on KSL Classifieds, including (but not limited to): an Amish fireplace, a 25 foot fake greenery garland, and 15 old windows.

If I do say so myself, it turned out quite spectacular and looked truly magical. Now come...PICTURES!! (I know that's why you're reading this anyway.)

BEFORE:

AFTER:

PC: Cheryl Johnson

CEILING BEFORE:

 CEILING AFTER, LIGHTS ON

AFTER:

AFTER, TABLE CANDLES

AFTER, STAGE:

psst...see my frosted old windows???

Here are some pictures of different elements that I also took on for the wedding:

THE CAKE

Confession: the top two layers are Styrofoam, the bottom is chocolate cake.

Some old outdoor porch lights turned into lanterns: 

The bridal bouquet. My dad drilled tiny little holes into the bottom of the pine cones so that I could stick them on a wire to make them work in the bouquet. The berries are fake but everything else is real, we picked the pine cones up off the ground and the roses and greenery came from Costco.

I tend to take over a space when working on a project...

Bouquet seen in action here with Krista and her three best friends.

PC: Cheryl Johnson

Table centerpieces which were--gratefully--set up by my wonderful Aunt Karen, Uncle Earle, and cousin Brittany.

Is it tacky to reuse wedding decorations? Because if it is I committed a double offense. The wood on the tables was used before and I made this back drop over the summer for when my brother Chad and sister-in-law Jennie got married. 

For this, I switched out the little brown dots with pine cones to fit the theme better and added some clear ornaments that had little candles in them.

My other sister Kara set up the entry which I didn't get a great picture of but it looked really great. These big pictures were printed by my parent's neighbor who has a large printer and she printed them and put them on some core board and got them all trimmed and looking nice just as a favor so that was super nice of her.

I think it's a wonderful thing for people to be able to write a little note so and to know who came but I think guest books are a tad bit silly. I really don't think many people sit down and go back through those very often. I suggested to Krista the idea of doing a "guest quilt" so I ended up making quilt blocks that people wrote on with fabric markers. 

As far as food goes, my mom made something like 400 dozen mini cookies and cupcakes. Krista and Trevor have a lot of friends, but not that many. Needless to say, we had plenty...

PC: Cheryl Johnson

I absolutely never could have pulled it off without my favorites putting in some serious overtime. My dad put in some serious hours figuring out how to make everything work and my brothers did some sorcery with that airplane cable to drape the ceilings. 

PC: Cheryl Johnson

But really...they're the best.

PC: Cheryl Johnson

And just one more time because it was so beautiful...

PC: Cheryl Johnson

One thing I do have to mention is that if I knew every bride was going to be like Krista, I'd quit school and start working as a wedding designer. She was probably the least picky person in the whole world about all of this which made things really fabulous for me.

After all was said and done, it was an absolute blast doing a large-scale creative project like this. It was so fun for me to be able to see things in my head that turned out so beautifully in real life. But in the end, it was all pretty and glowing for a grand total of maybe three hours. As soon as it was over family and friends pulled it all down in less time than it took to set up the tables. 

But it doesn't make a difference because no matter how beautiful the reception or how sparkly the lights, nothing can possible surpass the beauty of a couple making covenants in the temple that will last forever. 

PC: Cheryl Johnson

PC: Cheryl Johnson

Congratulations Krista & Trevor!!

PC: Cheryl Johnson